One Saturday night, I stand on the border. The great divide between two highly similar and notionally divided ways of life: that of North side and that of South side. Here, in the so-called “Tunnel,” the two breeds mix indiscriminately. They temporarily forgo their pride and sacred identity to fulfill cravings for curry, an elongated sub sandwich, or a $60 haircut.
Perched on the curb between Jacobs Fitness Center and the Eagles’ Nest, I can hear the chatter of girls in the distance: talk of pre-gaming and some place called Town. Their high heels click on the asphalt like the hooves of a poorly-coordinated Clydesdale. They are making the trek from North to South, as if to find others like themselves, those who were not so unfortunate as to be assigned to Leonard or McFoul or, god forbid, Hughes, “the place where fun goes to die.”
The harsh pierce of Jersey dialect rings in my ears as I cling to my five dollar foot-long Subway sandwich. I nervously tear a piece of honey oat bread from the thin paper wrapped expertly around it. I chew quickly, rodent-like. I stare at the spandex-clad creatures from the Shore as they pass me, turn around, and sprint back to the safety of my North Side nest in Leonard Hall. It is cold outside, and I do not want to spend an extra second in the unforgiving breeze. I wanna flee to my heated room and the comforts of “Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team” on CMT.
I wonder how such a divide came to be and, in my muckraking search, came shamefully fruitless. I reach only a vague conclusion that the two complexes of campus have been divided on the basis of geographic location. Could it be a matter of practicality? Or is it an insidious conspiracy to divide the wild from the sane, the brutish asses from the prudish masses? Indeed, There must be something perpetuating this divide, and I must find out what it is.
I set out to gauge how students feel about our pernicious partition, with loaded language in hand. I pose to one unsuspecting student the following question: If you were to compare the North-South division at AU to either the bloodbath between warring North and South Vietnam or the callous segregation of races in apartheid South Africa, which would you choose? When denied the option of neither, the respondent reluctantly chimed: “Vietnam, I guess …because of the North-South thing…”
Shocked, I stand unable to process the gravity of the divisions we have created. When I think of Vietnam in this era, I think of brutal murder and oppression; I think of the 16 years of American pillaging which brought enormous costs to all those involved; I think of the loathsomeness of human hate.
This is our world, AU. Let us not destroy it so.
okay. this is why i dislike this magazine. well that’s false, i dislike this magazine because it makes moderates who lean to the left look bad…but i digress. how do you end what could have been a good journalistic piece with a half assed political comment that not only is inappropriate and irrelevant, but without an actual conclusion or finding.
It’s pretty clear why there’s a division. having lived in both Hughes, and on South side, It’s clear the kind of experience you’re going to have. When I lived in Hughes I was surrounded by some of the most socially awkward people I’ve met in my entire life. No one partied and those that did partied in the way I would imagine an epileptic basement dweller with downs syndrome would party at a warehouse rave. Of course I mean no offense to any people with disabilities…but you get my point. The up side of living in Hughes, is that the normals all found each other, became good, lasting friends, and then promptly moved away from north side.
On south side you get a different kind of person. You get the guys who want to rush fraternities, and generally like to party, have a good time, and actually talk to members of the opposite sex. You also get girls ranging from the classy club hoppers, to frat groupies, to uber-skanks, to the party conciensious objector – yes i know i spelled that wrong, give me a break, i’m actually reading your commie magazine. People on South side like to have fun, take advantage of the fact the rides go out from the LA Quad, and don’t spend saturday night playing World of Warcraft or watching Anime or getting overly aquainted with their left hands. And here I’m actually insulting yall who fit this profile.
So yes, that is something you-the author-could have looked into. The real division between North and South is the social lives lived by their respective occupants. Sure there are outliers, but in the end we are always gonna end up generalizing.
Sincerely,
A four year journalist, patriot, member of greek life, world traveler who hates everything…well almost everything this magazine stands for.